Mindful English, Mindful Life

ENI want to start today with a strange question.

ENGo on.

ENWhen was the last time you spoke English and actually enjoyed it?

ENHm.

ENThat is harder to answer than it should be.

ENIt is.

ENAnd I think most people listening just felt that.

ENCan I be honest about something?

ENPlease.

ENLast week I was buying a coffee.

ENA thirty-second conversation.

ENNothing more.

ENAnd when I walked away, I realised I had corrected myself — inside my own head — about forty times.

ENForty.

ENForty.

EN"Was that the right tense?

ENDid that sound natural?

ENWhy did I say it like that?"

ENAnd here is the detail that matters.

ENSay it.

ENYou teach this language.

ENI teach this language for a living.

ENSo if it happens to you, imagine the person who is three months into learning it.

ENExactly.

ENSo today is not a grammar episode.

ENNo verb tables today.

ENToday we are talking about something much quieter.

ENWe are talking about how to learn English without that voice in your head that never stops judging you.

ENAnd before we start — one quick thing.

ENEverything we talk about today, you can take with you.

ENIt's all at yourenglishtoolbox.com.

ENThe vocabulary, downloadable PDFs, little games to practise — in more and more languages, Farsi and German included.

ENSo if a word catches you today, you know exactly where to find it.

ENNow.

ENLet's begin.

ENAnd we are going to travel a little bit to do it.

ENWe are going around the world, actually.

ENBecause it turns out that almost every culture on earth worked this out a long time ago.

ENSo let's start with the word everyone has heard and nobody can define.

ENMindfulness.

ENMindfulness.

ENWhen people hear that word, they picture incense.

ENCandles.

ENSomeone sitting cross-legged making a humming sound.

ENAnd that is exactly why they switch off.

ENRight.

ENSo let's strip all of that away.

ENPlease.

ENMindfulness is just this: paying attention to the present moment, without judging it.

ENThat's it?

ENThat's it.

ENYou are here.

ENYou notice you are here.

ENAnd you don't attack yourself for it.

ENOkay, but Martin, when I am speaking English, I am not "in the present moment."

ENI am in the future — worrying about the next word.

ENOr in the past — replaying the mistake I just made.

ENAnd that is the whole problem, isn't it.

ENThat is the whole problem.

ENYou are everywhere except in the actual conversation.

ENSo here is what I find beautiful.

ENThis idea is not new, and it is not owned by anyone.

ENNo. Let's take the trip.

ENLet's go to Japan first.

ENJapan gave us a few gifts here.

ENThere is a word — "ma".

EN"Ma" is the silence between things.

ENThe pause.

ENThe empty space.

ENAnd in Japanese culture, that space is not awkward.

ENIt has meaning.

ENThink about that when you speak English.

ENWhen you leave a silence to think, you are not failing.

ENYou are giving the sentence room to breathe.

ENAnd there is another one — "wabi-sabi".

ENThe beauty of imperfection.

ENThe English you already speak, with its little cracks, is not broken.

ENIt is human.

ENSo there is your first phrase to keep: "the beauty of imperfection".

ENNow let's fly north.

ENTo Denmark.

ENHygge.

ENEverybody has seen this word on a candle in a shop.

ENBut underneath the candles, it means something real.

ENWarmth.

ENBeing present in the small, cozy moments.

ENAnd this is a gift for a learner.

ENHow so?

ENYou don't learn English best in an exam room.

ENYou learn it in comfort.

ENRelaxed.

ENAt ease.

EN"At ease." That's the phrase.

ENLearn English the way you would enjoy a warm evening — not the way you'd sit a test.

ENNow take us somewhere old.

ENReally old.

ENAncient Greece and Rome.

ENThe Stoics.

ENAh.

ENThey had a word — "ataraxia".

ENA calm that comes from accepting what you cannot control.

ENAnd you cannot control everything about your English.

ENYou cannot control your accent overnight.

ENYou cannot control whether you sound exactly like someone born there.

ENSo let that go.

EN"Let it go." Even the Stoics were saying it two thousand years ago.

ENYou control one thing: whether you communicate.

ENAnd you can.

ENLet's keep going east.

ENZen Buddhism.

ENTaoism.

ENThis is where a lot of modern mindfulness actually comes from.

ENThere is a concept in Taoism — "wu wei".

ENEffortless action.

ENFlowing instead of forcing.

ENEvery learner knows the opposite of this.

ENThe forcing.

ENThe gripping.

ENThe trying so hard that nothing comes out.

ENAnd the Zen side gives us "sati" — simple awareness.

ENJust noticing.

ENSo two phrases here: "to notice", and "to flow".

ENWhen the English flows, stop analysing it.

ENLet it flow.

ENNow India.

ENThere's a word I love — "santosha".

ENContentment.

ENThe feeling of "this is enough".

ENEnough.

ENYour English today is enough to start a conversation today.

ENIt doesn't have to be finished to be useful.

EN"Enough." Keep that one close.

ENLet's go to Africa.

ENBecause this one changes everything.

ENUbuntu.

EN"I am because we are."

ENA language is not a test you pass alone.

ENIt is a bridge to other people.

ENWhen you speak English, you are not being examined.

ENYou are reaching someone.

ENYou are not alone in it.

EN"You are not alone." That is the phrase from Ubuntu.

ENTwo more, quickly, because I don't want to lose them.

ENThe Arabic-speaking world.

ENSufi tradition.

ENThere's a word — "sakina".

ENA serenity that settles over you.

ENStillness that arrives on its own.

ENYou cannot chase it.

ENYou make space, and it comes.

EN"Stillness." Same as before — you can't force it, you invite it.

ENAnd finally, Hawaii.

ENAloha.

ENAnd "ho'oponopono".

ENAloha is presence and love.

ENHo'oponopono is about releasing — letting go of what weighs on you.

ENIncluding the shame of an old mistake.

EN"To release." That's the last phrase.

ENSo look at what just happened.

ENJapan, Denmark, Greece, China, India, Africa, the Arab world, Hawaii.

ENCompletely different places.

ENDifferent centuries.

ENDifferent gods, even.

ENAnd they all said the same thing.

ENHappiness isn't in getting more.

ENIt's in the stillness.

ENIn being here, without judging it.

ENNow — here is the turn.

ENHere's where it becomes about you and your English.

ENBecause there is a mistake that almost every English learner makes, everywhere in the world.

ENEverywhere.

ENIt doesn't matter what country you're in.

ENYou treat English like a permanent exam.

ENAn exam that never ends.

ENEvery sentence is graded.

ENEvery word is watched.

ENYou are hyper-alert.

ENYou correct yourself in real time.

ENAnd underneath it all, there's a quiet fear: "someone is going to notice I got it wrong."

ENAnd here is the cruel part.

ENTell them.

ENThat state — the alertness, the fear, the judging — is the exact opposite of the state where a language is learned.

ENThis is real, by the way.

ENThis isn't a nice metaphor.

ENIt's not.

ENWhen your brain feels safe and calm, it moves into what scientists call an alpha state.

ENRelaxed, but awake.

ENAnd that is when your memory opens up.

ENThat is when new words actually stick.

ENSo the fear isn't just unpleasant.

ENIt is literally getting in the way of the thing you want.

ENStress narrows you.

ENCalm opens you.

ENSo mindfulness, applied to English, is very simple.

ENLower the alert.

ENTolerate the mistake.

ENLearn from a place of calm.

ENOkay.

ENBut people want something to do.

ENGive them something to do.

ENFair.

ENThree small things.

ENAnyone, anywhere.

ENNumber one.

ENHave one conversation a day where you do not correct yourself.

ENNot once.

ENLet the mistakes live.

ENJust communicate.

ENNumber two.

ENNumber two.

ENWhen you feel something, name it in English instead of hiding it.

EN"I'm nervous." "I'm not sure how to say this." "This is hard for me."

ENThat is real English.

ENAnd it is honest.

ENNumber three.

ENBefore you speak — don't rehearse the perfect sentence.

ENJust breathe once.

ENOne breath.

ENThen speak.

ENYou'd be amazed how much comes out when you stop gripping.

ENNow.

ENWe've talked a lot today.

ENWe have.

ENWe've talked about all of it.

ENBut talking about calm and feeling calm are two very different things.

ENThey are completely different things.

ENAnd this is where we hand you over.

ENBecause we can explain this to you.

ENPeter can make you feel it.

ENIf you don't know the STILL series yet — go and find it.

ENPeter doesn't talk about stillness.

ENHe takes you into it.

ENIt is English learning, but it is also — genuinely — a few minutes of peace.

ENLearn the words while your whole body slows down.

ENThat is the other half of this episode.

ENGo and let Peter give it to you.

ENAnd one last thing before we go.

ENEverything we mentioned today — the vocabulary, the phrases from around the world —

ENyou can go deeper on all of it.

ENEverything lives at yourenglishtoolbox.com.

ENDownloadable PDFs, detailed vocabulary, even little games to practise.

ENAnd it's not only in English.

ENWe're translating into more and more languages — Farsi, German, and more on the way.

ENSo wherever you are, and whatever language you think in —

ENthere's a version of the toolbox for you.

ENBe kind to yourself this week.

ENMindful English.

ENMindful life.

ENSee you next time.